Mature Love In The Autumn Of Life
Mature love is defined by life experience and a calm heart. We are talking about souls in the autumn of life who find each other at the end of a stage with a different concept of love. They do not see love as a conquest or invasion, but as a simple connection, based on joy, tenderness and mutual understanding. These are (usually) honest relationships that make room for a wonderful stage in life.
We often hear that true love awaits us in the golden years. However, this is not entirely true. We tend to fall into the trap of making endless comparisons with our other life experiences when reality is actually a little simpler. After all, it is to exist to know how to appreciate everything that happens in each stage. It is to appreciate the experiences of our youth, with all its good and bad choices, while enjoying every gift that our later years offer us.
In each cycle, we receive external information and experiences in a specific way. When we are young, we let in almost everything. We open our arms to the world and meet everything in our path with enthusiasm and infinite energy. We are like intense summer storms. Later we become more selective and careful. The memory of the intense summers still lingers, but now we prefer a warm breeze that evokes calm, golden afternoons and peaceful beaches.
Mature love does not give up cheerfulness or innocence, but it seeks to avoid making the same old mistakes. Mature love knows that couples are not soulmates, but rather two distinct souls who have their own (and sometimes very different) experiences. They are individual souls who want to give love another opportunity. And why not? Let’s dive a little deeper into this concept of mature love.
Mature love, when getting older is synonymous with happiness
Alberto and Maite are both over sixty years old, and today they have decided to take the big step: they will live together. Not all of their children are happy about it. “He’s just there for the money,” says one. “They are just trying to cover up their loneliness,” says another. “It’s just a phase,” another dares to whisper. “In a few months they will be back to their things, their books, their trips and their grandchildren…”
However, neither Alberto nor Maite are particularly concerned about these criticisms and opinions. That’s not what they care about now. Wrinkles and scars may damage their skin, but they also cover their hearts and their will with strength. They know what they are doing and why they are doing it. They are not children. Maturity gives wisdom, not innocence. Their emotional baggage contains too many experiences for this decision to be just a whim or a phase.
Love in the fall of life, contrary to the meaning of sons and daughters and everyone else who observes without really seeing, has no selfishness and no need to prove anything. Mature love contains nothing artificial. Its thoughts, purposes, and caresses are so genuine that the light of truth illuminates them. It is a complete feeling that fills the mind, hands and heart.
On the other hand, it is a fact that Alberto and Maite are certainly familiar with. Many of the younger population believe that maturity or the fall of life is synonymous with passivity and resignation. As if love or passion had an expiration date. As if it was forbidden territory for those with gray hair and those who have more life behind them than in front of them.
This is a misunderstanding of the younger generation. In fact, if there is one positive psychology that teaches us, it is that the curve of happiness reaches its highest peak at this stage. This is a time when love is an easier and purer experience.
The new timeline and the meaning of love
Love in old age gives love a more satisfying rest than love in earlier stages. It is not a fire that burns the skin, but a river that carries us on a journey of discovery with our partner. It is an opportunity to grow, experiment and give a new kind of happiness. Contrary to what skeptics may think, people in this case experience, on average, greater mental well-being.
An interesting study by economists Blanchflower and Oswald concluded that perceptions of happiness and personal satisfaction are in fact most intense in childhood and old age. If we depicted happiness throughout our life cycle, it would have a “U” shape, with the first peak in childhood and the second around fifty years.
However, it is clear that getting older does not guarantee mental maturity. Emotional balance is not automatic either, but a good part of the elderly population manages it with outstanding integrity and a fantastic attitude.
Mature love may not be as overwhelming as a teenager’s first love, but it is undoubtedly more fruitful and satisfying.
