How To Deal With The Fear Of Being Alone?

The fear of being alone is inherent in humans. As social beings, we must have other people around us to feel fulfilled. In fact, many of our abilities are related to other people. The bonds you develop with others nourish you, enrich your life and are necessary for your well-being.

However, this can be a problem if you can not live a normal life without having people around you. It does not matter if this fear arises because your partner left you or because you had to move to another country. It may reach the point where it starts to suffocate you. Let’s talk more about this issue.

What does the fear of being alone mean?

The fear of being alone is based on the belief that you can not do things that require you to be alone. It can be so intense that you can get to the point where you can not even take care of yourself. Alternatively, you may desperately seek the company of others as soon as you are alone. Some experts also call this autophobia, or “fear of oneself”.

The fear of being alone is usually associated with external agents. In children, some experts have linked this to separation. This can manifest itself when a child is unable to understand that their caregivers will not only get up and leave them permanently, but only leave for a short period of time.

In adults, the fear of being alone goes hand in hand with the loss of a loved one. It also manifests itself in cases of sentimental separation. A deep sense of being abandoned and low self-esteem leads to this fear.

How to overcome the fear of being alone?

1. Understand your fears

The first step in overcoming this fear is simple introspection. It is important that you understand what you are going through in order to be able to implement measures. This is often the most difficult and important step because you have a variety of defense mechanisms, starting with simple denial.

You can resort to denial to try to ignore fear or during stressful periods. In the long run, however, you can not exclude that part of you. As such, understanding what is happening to you is the beginning of the healing process.

2. Accept your fears

You have to do more than just recognize your fear if you really want to deal with it. You must also accept that it is a part of you. This process is not as simple as it sounds, and it goes hand in hand with forgiveness.

You can not allow guilt to take over your mind because fear, among other things, makes you grow. If you can find value in fear, you will also experience self-development. Remember that the Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung once said: “We can not change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it suppresses ”.

3. Analyze the reasons for the fear of being alone

All fear has a source. It is important for you to discover what the origin of your fears is. This will allow you to weigh your options in terms of possible solutions. In addition, it helps you figure out what the fear is trying to tell you.

The fear of being alone tends to be caused by separation, distance and loss, as we mentioned earlier. In fact, it is often linked to other emotions, such as:

• A fear of being abandoned.
• The fear of failure or an excess of perfectionism and responsibility.
• A fear of what people will say or think.

Identifying the cause can seem like a simple process. However, the pain you feel often distorts your reality and makes the process of overcoming the problem more difficult. This is why it is important to remember that you should not ignore your emotions, but instead work directly with them.

Think of the positive aspects of being alone

Overcoming your fear of being alone does not necessarily mean avoiding it. You need to understand that being alone is a necessary and positive part of your life. It can be a refuge where you can get in touch with yourself.

To achieve this goal, you can associate being alone with positive things. If you do this, your fears will begin to lose intensity. Being alone can lead to a period of rejuvenation in your life. You may find that you have to prioritize taking care of yourself.

5. Being alone is a human need

As we have discussed, being alone is good for your emotional health. This means that it is important to seek time alone, perhaps even on a daily basis, to regain the energies you lose throughout the day.

A walk alone, watching a movie you like, going out to eat alone… Take advantage of these moments to enjoy the solitude you need.

6. Professional help

Sometimes the fear of being alone can be a serious problem. It can even end in depression, anxiety and emotional dependence. Therefore, it is important to consult a professional if you feel the need for it.

Remember: You are your best companion. Without yourself, you would not be who you are. It may seem like an obvious thing to say, but people often forget that they are their own best friends. Only you can understand yourself perfectly. The only truly indispensable person in your life is you.