It’s Important To Strengthen Your Emotional Vocabulary

Strengthening your emotional vocabulary will help you improve the quality of your relationships. It’s about knowing how to express yourself in a confident way. Furthermore, it is also about being in line with your needs, while still being sympathetic to the needs of others. In addition, it is about translating your feelings into words and creating bridges based on respect and self-confidence.

When we talk about this dimension of our personality, it is natural to focus our interest in children. Currently, both families and teachers understand the importance of teaching children this skill. The study of emotional literacy and the relationship to language gives relatively interesting results.

In this context, studies such as the one conducted by psychologists Luna Beck and Irina Kumschick from the University of Minnesota show how we can improve children’s emotional vocabulary.

This skill is very important for children. But what about adults? What happens to those who are unable to express their fears and needs and frustrations to others?

Not all adults had the opportunity to develop socio-emotionally at an early age. Therefore, not all of us have regulatory mechanisms and verbal flow that can translate our emotions into words.

This is how you can strengthen your emotional vocabulary

Strengthening our emotional vocabulary reduces our overall vulnerability. This is because words make us visible when we put emotions into our language. It validates ourselves and everyone else around us. It is a way of shaping our emotions and showing them to the world. Furthermore, it is a release of internal knots, a way to harmonize the chaos and channel it in simple words that can be understood.

We experience all realities that we do not quite know how to transfer to others due to language differences. “Kilig” is a word in Tagalog, the language they speak in the Philippines. It expresses the feeling of joy we experience when we talk to someone we like.

Furthermore, in Dutch, the term “uitwaaien” describes the experience of enjoying the wind and the emotions it produces in us. Having sufficient words that allow us to integrate such realities is exceptional, even redemptive.

Unfortunately, many of us cannot find the right words to describe how we feel. In many cases, we do not even know exactly how we are feeling. The lack of emotional vocabulary causes us to suppress emotions because we do not know how to express them.

Keys to strengthening our emotional vocabulary

Emotional awareness and face recognition

Charles Darwin talked about emotional expression back in his day. He defined it as an internal state that is felt, and therefore expresses itself. Thus, the first step is to be conscious, to connect to the bodily state where the emotions first express themselves. This happens with emotions such as fear, sadness, anger, disappointment, etc.

Every emotion has a physiological match that we must accept, and we must understand the message and etiquette. For example, you need to identify if what you are feeling is anger, jealousy or another emotion. This is because it is useless to suppress your emotions.

On the other hand, to strengthen our emotional vocabulary, it is also important to know how to recognize the needs of others. You need to be sensitive, receptive and empathetic to the feelings of others so that you can communicate better with them.

The emotional vocabulary and verbal flow

Experts recommend that we learn to use emotional verbs, a very effective mechanism for transmitting emotions. For example I feel, I want, I am excited, I am scared, I feel, I feel discomfort, I am jealous…

Furthermore, in addition to using the above strategy, it is necessary to train yourself in verbal fluency. Some people are perceived as good communicators and good at conversing, but contrary to what everyone thinks, they lack verbal flow in emotional relationships. How can this be possible?

Basically, they do not know how to talk about their feelings or needs, and they are not competent enough to maintain conversations about personal and sentimental topics. This type of flow is what you need to have to strengthen your emotional vocabulary.

The emotional narrative

Each of us generates different types of stories. We tell stories to ourselves as we integrate our life experiences. Telling them properly will allow us to respect ourselves more, to nurture our needs, and to value ourselves as we deserve.

One way to achieve this is through emotional intelligence. Knowing ourselves, giving ourselves what we need and practicing self-pity. Being confident and empathetic allows us to create a clearer narrative. All this will be transformed into a positive self-concept with which we will be able to communicate better with others.

We are all emotional beings who can learn to justify at any time. Having better control of this inner universe will make it easier for us. That is why it is so important to strengthen our emotional vocabulary.