5 Tips For Family Gatherings: Join Them Successfully

The end of the year is only a few months away, and that means Christmas dinners, family gatherings, and being with friends. Nothing must go wrong when you are with your family. However, there are conflicts in every family and Christmas parties are a good chance for conflicts to arise. In any case, Christmas is a complicated season for many adults. If this is the case for you, do not worry – you are not the only one. Today we will give you 5 tips for family gatherings!

It is important to point out that conflicts are part of family life. It is normal for family members to make you feel bad sometimes. However, danger arises when the conflict goes unresolved and it solidifies. So much so that it can end up exploding during Christmas Eve or for lunch on Christmas Eve. Does this sound familiar to you? If the answer is yes, with some tips for family gatherings, we will help you ensure that past circumstances do not take over and destroy them.

As I said, in this article we have gathered 5 important tips for family gatherings and successful navigation through them. The idea is that these strategies will help you with people you have problems with (or have had problems with in the past). Not only that, but if you follow these tips, you can even have fun, feel festive and actively participate in the gathering. You can cram all our advice and have it in your back pocket if things start to get tense and you may feel that a conflict is about to break out.

5 tips for family gatherings this coming holiday

Avoid reacting to provocations. If there is anything to discuss, it is not the moment.

When you have an unresolved issue with someone, it is tempting to bring it up at the first opportunity. It is understandable that you want to talk about things and get some conclusion. This is why, when you find yourself with a person you have a conflict with, you jab provoke them without realizing it. Or you can allow yourself to be provoked.

In this situation, it is important to identify the possible provocation as soon as possible. The goal is to redirect the conversation to a neutral topic. When you are on friendly ground, the excitement will go away. Family gatherings are definitely not the time to talk about sensitive topics.

2. Focus on those who feel lucky that the family is together. Do it for them!

In many families, there are certain people, such as mother, father or grandfather, who are very happy to have the whole family together. The rest of the family agrees to join family parties, in part because they want to make them happy. So, if you do not feel motivated to gather with your family, concentrate on the fact that your gesture will make someone you love happy.

3. Analyze and be honest with yourself: what is bothering you? Does it have a solution?

When you are near a particular person who is bothering you, you need to find out what is really going on. Can you change what is bothering you? Does this person have a trait that bothers you because it is actually one you share? Answering these questions is fundamental to dealing with the emotions that come up during a conflict. Maybe the problem is a family member’s personality trait that is not going to change. In that case, you must be the one working with your tolerance. You can also try to avoid circumstances where this characteristic may come up.

Somehow a family reunion is not the right time to try to promote change in anyone. It does not matter how good your intentions are or how much the person needs to change. This is not a good time to tell someone that they smoke too much or should eat more. You have the whole year to do it, so do not ruin the party with comments that could hurt someone. So a good tip for family gatherings is to hold back, even if you think your comments are not offensive.

4. Talk to yourself and reflect on whether it is worth having a conflict during a family gathering

When you feel angry, try to take a few minutes to talk to yourself and reflect. Is it really worth starting a quarrel right now? When I say “talk to yourself”, I mean use self-education to your advantage. Self-instructions are instructions that you give yourself.

In other words, the words you say to yourself act as orders in the brain. So, if you tell yourself to be calm and controlled, it will be easier for you to deal with your family and get through the collection successfully.

5. Avoid reaching your limit. Get out of the situation before it’s too late.

Avoidance is not always a negative coping strategy. Also, it is actually the best strategy when dealing with a complicated situation and there is neither time nor place to discuss it. Abstinence is the best option if you already know that you are going to get angry, lose control and make other people feel uncomfortable. Trying to control your anger when patience is already exhausted is not a realistic goal.

It is also an important tip for family gatherings to set boundaries with family members before Christmas. Every family works differently. Your family can be independent or very close. If your family is independent, the boundaries between the lives of each family member are set and respected. That way, when family gatherings take place, the work is already done.

On the other hand, if your family is very close, boundaries may not be set. In that case, it is a good idea to put them on before you gather. This is because family gatherings are not the best time to explain your personal needs. It is not ideal to try to ward off those family members who tend to become overly involved in your life.

In any case, it is always a good idea to set boundaries with family members. Be aware of what you want to share. It is also important to communicate when you want advice and when you do not want it. Remember that you have the right to make your own decisions, even if those decisions go against what most people in the family believe or believe.

Finally, take advantage of the holidays to enjoy the positive side of family gatherings. Focus your energy and your attention on the positive. Above all, remember to be patient and not get into conflicts. That way, a good idea will not end up being uncomfortable for everyone involved. Do not forget that your attitude during the holidays can have a big impact on the well-being of others.

Now that you’ve read our tips for family gatherings, do you know anyone else who needs them?