To You, Who Left Without Saying Goodbye – A Burning Letter

To you, who left without saying goodbye, who after sharing so much (or so I thought) reduced it to something so insignificant. I still do not understand how you could go from hot to cold in just a few seconds. You lost your light in just one day, and words that used to build me up were turned into bullets and gunpowder.

To you, yes. When did you change your mind, and how did I not notice it? How is it possible that I continued to believe that our love was authentic and genuine? Why did you not tell me when you discovered that our defense mechanisms had failed? That we were no longer protected?

I am left with no answer, with a thousand pieces of doubt, with a creeping sense of guilt. One day I think it was my fault, then I think it was you, then that it was both of us, or simply time and routine… Other days, I realize that walking around in circles like this, will only make me more upset, more damaged. Although this circle of thoughts also keeps you alive, if only in my memories.

To you, who took everything from me in just a few seconds

To you, yes. You who dreamed of a future with me. Which made me dream of traveling, magical moments, unconditional support. Which included me in your everyday life, in your new projects, even in your fantasies.

In fact, it was you who encouraged us to make plans, it was you who reminded me of the good we had together, you who said that neither events nor people could separate us. You were the one who told me that all you needed was to feel the feeling I gave you. Sometimes calm or peaceful or quiet, other times passionate and full of desire. I motivated you to overcome, and I told you how much I valued you.

I refuse to believe that you were able to delete everything we shared in an instant. Not just what we said to each other, but everything we conveyed through everything we did for each other, through all the embraces we shared. The desire to take the world by storm, to cuddle on the couch with our eyes closed, to hold hands and kiss, to surround ourselves with happiness, to laugh until we cry, to push away the anxiety and stroke our hand over the bed , just to make sure the other person was there every morning when we woke up. I refuse to believe that all that is gone.

I know it’s possible, that I can not rule it out. But I find it impossible to believe that all the good, happy moments no longer exist. Call me naive or ignorant, but our emotions have so much power over us, and I have a bad habit of giving in to them.

To you, who left without saying goodbye, who gave up instead of fighting

To you, who left without saying goodbye. This letter is for you, this burning letter born of a love I did not think could end.

You still do not understand where the crack came from – the indifference, this desire to end it all until there was almost nothing left that could hold us together. But what brings me the most pain is the uncertainty, not knowing what reasons you had, that you did not want to try to understand. It was the first time a storm had shaken us up in this way.

“Fighting” is a verb that strengthens couples, at least couples who have grown and learned from their mistakes, and who would not consider leaving the ship at the sign of the first problem. Those who know that holding together makes them stronger also know that excitement disappears as love develops. Nevertheless, it is possible to get the embers to burn again.

I’m sorry, but I do not understand. It is impossible to close a door that has neither a lock nor a key, and it was you who opened it. The hardest part is knowing that you did not even consider the possibility of repairing things, or at least talking about what went so wrong.

To you

That said, I do not think I regret giving you a year of my life. I know that, at some point, I did something that did not fit what you expected or wanted, but I need you to tell me. I’m not perfect. A word, a hint, a small sign… anything to show me what you felt in response to my naive actions. Unfortunately, I have no crystal ball.

I beg your pardon. I never meant to hurt you. I’m sorry if I did. But I still do not understand the urgency of the situation. At least this first time. If this had happened before, maybe it would have been easier. Or if bad feelings had been building up for a while. But even today you took my hand, told me that you loved me, and talked to me about the dreams you had for our future. Then you threw everything away, just in one night.

To you, yes. You who left without saying goodbye. I speak to you because your absence haunts me, hurts me. It feels like this emptiness is only growing. Because I love you, I miss you, and I know you will miss me too.