I Can Not Do Everything, I’m Tired Of Being Tired

Sometimes I just can not do everything. Sometimes it’s too much for me. I do not have enough hands, eyes or time for everything and everyone… I am tired of being tired.

But it’s true: I can not do everything. And it’s healthy to acknowledge what my boundaries are. Understanding that I also need time for myself and that I have the right to say “I can no longer”, is healthy.

Many of us have come to a point where we are tired of being tired. Life can be overwhelming because not only is our body empty, but we also have two angry voices competing in our heads. The first does nothing but shout  “Do not stop now, you have too much to do” , while the second insists “but what if I can do no more.”

It is not enough to perform a version of “Let it go” from the movie Frost, take a break or log off from everything for a few hours and enjoy the  fantasy that we are the last on earth, that we are finally alone and nothing need our immediate attention.

These are just patches that cover a deeper wound. They stop the bleeding, but they do not solve the problem.

Because it is a type of exhaustion that betrays the underlying stress and anxiety. We can not think clearly, and we get sick.

I’m tired of being tired, tired of not being able to handle life

Here is an example. Carolina works every day from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. When she finishes work, she takes care of her mother who has Alzheimer’s.

Each month, she saves a portion of her salary so she can pay for a master’s degree for her sister, something she keeps secret from her current unemployed husband.

Carolina wants the best for everyone, she wants to take good care of her mother, give her sister a good future, and maintain her appearance in the marriage.

Carolina’s physical and mental exhaustion is extreme. There are days when she is considering other options, perhaps paying someone to help her mother, but she knows that this will mean that it is not possible to save for her sister’s studies.

Your brain is looking for alternatives, and it is the frontal lobes that perform this refined task of planning, reflection and analysis. But when you do not find good solutions, your primitive brain comes to the helm.

That’s when we feel paralyzed, when our brain chemistry changes and we feel trapped, thinking “no matter what I do,  everything will  go wrong”.

The heart rate accelerates, hormones get out of balance and the demon of fear takes over. It destroys everything and exhaustion  seeps into every atom of our being.

Sometimes I can not do everything, but it’s ok

“I have so much to do, I do not know where to start, but if I do not start now, it will get worse later.” “My boss will fire me if I do not complete this.” “My parents will be disappointed if I do not go”…

If we look at the language we use, we see a pattern of “if and then”: if I do not do this, then it happens…

Living based on “worst case” scenarios wears out your brain and reduces your energy, it’s as simple as that. Accepting that you can not do everything is healthy because if you try to carry everything on your back, you will sooner or later collapse.

Take a look at these suggestions and really examine your heart.

Are you tired of being tired? It’s time to change focus

Although difficult to admit, we sometimes fall into our own traps. Telling ourselves that “we can do anything” is dangerous, a mistake we can correct by changing our thought patterns:

• Every day when you get up, remember this simple phrase: “I do the best I can at this time given the resources I have and the condition I find myself in”.
• Avoid traps of language or thought. Instead of “I’m not good enough, I have to work harder to do everything” , say “I want to give my best every day and every moment, but without neglecting myself”.
• When you feel that your body can no longer do anything… despite getting enough sleep, analyze your thoughts. Sometimes, it is struggling us  out  the most, our own discouragement, our over thinking, “I’m not going to do it” , “I can not do anything right” .

Last but not least, it is important that you take care of and notice your circadian rhythm and your routines. Taking breaks, taking a few hours during the day for yourself, does not mean that you give less or fail someone: it is healthy, it is necessary.

In the same way , having the courage to say out loud that you have boundaries is not the end of the world. The stars will remain up there in the sky, the flowers will not all wither and die.

If you dare to stop trying to do everything, it will be ok.